What REALLY Happens During the Holidays

I took a break from all things social media, for the most part, over the holidays. I would like to say it was because I wanted to focus on spending time with my family, but it was really because with the kids home from school and day care it was all I could do to keep them from destroying the house and smashing each other.

Enjoying ones holiday is always a bit different than what you imagine. You have visions of Christmas music playing in the background, the smell of cookies coming from the kitchen and the sound of children’s laughter as they enjoy 2 weeks at home with their family.

And then you wake up and experience the REALITY of the holidays.

I envision: A house nicely decorated in coordinating colors with all the festive trappings (what the hell are trappings?).

In reality: My house looks as it someone dumped a hodge podge of green and red decorations in random spots throughout the house.

I envision: My girls in cute holiday outfits with matching hair bows and shoes.

In reality: After finally finding outfits that weren’t full of sequins, tulle and lace like a beauty pageant queen, Sweets has a fit over being told what to wear and the little one lost a shoe on the way into Christmas Eve dinner. Then their outfits were covered in everything they had for dinner before we got the family photo shot, which brings me to…

I envision: A beautiful family photo by the Christmas tree.

In reality: After 1,000 attempts I end up with a shot of a squirmy Noggin, Sweets making any kind of face other than a smiling one and a photobombing dog.

I envision: Reading “Twas the Night Before Christmas” by the fire, sipping an after dinner egg nog.

In reality: Sweets wanted to read ANY.BOOK.EXCEPT.THAT! But there WAS egg nog. With bourbon.

I envision: Watching my kiddo’s opening presents and enjoying all the gifts while I sit on the couch taking memorable photo’s, sipping a large cup of coffee.

In reality: There is barely contained chaos, wrapping paper flying through the air, boxes tossed aside with barely a glance and a disgusted “ugh, clothes again” comment and realizing we do not have batteries or the correct implements to open toys packaged in what can only be described with lots of expletives. But there WAS coffee. With Baileys.

I envision: Happy kids playing contentedly with their new toys all day while I sit on the couch listening to Micheal Buble’s Christmas Special and sipping a  big cup of coffee.

In reality: Toys need batteries that we don’t have, pieces go missing 5 minutes after unopening, Sweets needs “another player” and all too soon we hear the all too familiar “I’m bored!”. But there WAS coffee. With Baileys.

I envision: A 10 hour car ride to see family where the kids will sleep and watch movies while I will read and nap.

In reality: HAHAHAHAHAHA!

I envision: A NYE with friends where the kids go to bed early and the adults stay up drinking merry drinks.

In reality: Noggin refuses to sleep and is a cranky disaster and Sweets is given a horn blower 2 hours before midnight for our listening pleasure (and that may be a slight exaggertation but it certainly SEEMED like 2 hours of horn blowing). But there were merry drinks, and I funneled a buttload of Cupcake enjoyed a couple.

I envision: A holiday spent with family and friends I love, cuddles with my kids on the couch, late nights laughing and eating, watching my kids enjoy their grandparents and getting a warm, fuzzy feeling in my heart that will carry me through the new year.

In reality: A holiday spent with family and friends I love, cuddles with my kids on the couch, late nights laughing and eating, watching my kids enjoy their grandparents and getting a warm, fuzzy feeling in my heart that will carry me through the new year. Oh, and fireball shots. TOOO many fireball shots….

Have a great crazy New Year!